I recently posted this piece on my FB page DCPutnam Consulting. The posting received more than 2,300 hits and obviously had a huge impact on my readers. I want to include it here so others may see it in the future. (Double click on diagram to enlarge.)
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This diagram was recently posted by a close friend and colleague.
It occurs to me that grief does not follow a specific time line or direction. You don’t move from point A to point Z in a straight line.. you make progress and then you take a few steps back or make turns before moving forward again.
Everyone’s grief journey is different. You may find that months or years later you are still grieving. There is no “right way” to grieve.
Grief and loss take people up and down with their emotions and how they handle life. You may look “just fine” on the outside, but inside you may continue to struggle with your grief for many, many months or years. Triggers like birthdays, anniversaries or holidays can be very difficult to deal with over time. Just when you think you have put a certain grief emotion behind you, it may surprise you and pop up again because something has triggered that response.
It’s good to listen to the caring advice of close friends and family, but ultimately this is a job you have to do all by yourself. No one… no one can do it for you. Be confident that in time you will learn how to live the new life you are facing, you will learn to adjust and figure out how to move forward.